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Sun March 17, 2013
Yogurt For Men: A Review
Originally published on Wed March 20, 2013 12:44 pm
"If male yogurt marketing is anywhere near as annoying as female yogurt marketing, you are in for a treat. Every female yogurt commercial is basically like women in a wedding dress just petting a kitten and eating yogurt."
Powerful sent us a crate of the stuff this week. It arrived as all manly products do, carried by a Navy Seal who then punches it into your face.
The first thing you notice about the Powerful Yogurt container is that it has a six pack. Later editions will come with a beer gut and will never take their shirt off at the beach, insisting it's just because they "burn easily."
Peter: I liked the fact there was no lid. You had to smash it on your forehead to get to it.
Ian: I guess this is pretty manly, but not as manly as that Dannon flavor you have to hunt and kill with your bare hands.
Mike: This is good. Like, this is "morning after a night in a Tijuana brothel and I still have both my kidneys" good.
Brogurt doesn't taste so different than regular yogurt. We were sort of hoping for manly flavors, like "Truck" or "Mixed Berry Martial Arts."
Miles: I could really go for some "Essence of Burt Reynolds."
Mike: I like that yogurt flavor titles do not appear on bill.
Robert: I love the effect this is having on everybody. Finally, Eva can sing baritone in my barbershop quartet.
Eva: Could do without this chest hair, though.
[The verdict: not bad. I'm not sure if there's anything in it that actually made me any manlier, but after eating it, I did win seven straight Tours de France.]
This review comes from the folks at Sandwich Monday, a satirical feature from the humorists at Wait Wait ... Don't Tell Me!